Explore being “true to you” through these 10 tips
Have you ever tried to shift your looks or standards so that you could be liked or accepted? Maybe you dyed your hair in high school to be like the others. Or you’ve laughed at office jokes you don’t think are funny so you can fit in. Or you bought a designer jacket you couldn’t afford because of the reaction you might get from others.
It’s easy to get caught up in the trap of shifting your behavior so that you’ll blend in or be accepted. After a while, you may have even devoted so much energy to fitting in that you’re not even sure who you are anymore.
Why Knowing Who We Are Is Important
Having a sense of who you are – a deeply settled contentment with how God made you – will help you function from a secure place. You’ll be better able to withstand criticism. You’ll compare yourself less to others. And you won’t feel a need to strive or perform to get others’ approval.
After all, you are pretty great just like you are. Maybe it’s been too long since someone told you that, but it’s true. God made only one human being in all of time and history just like you.
So, if you’ve gotten a little sidetracked or don’t feel quite like yourself, here are 10 ways to remember to get back to being beautiful, worthy, quirky you.
10 Ways to Begin Being Authentic
1. List Your Favorite Things
Write down a list of your favorites – everything from pizza toppings to music to movies. It’s good to be flexible and yield your preferences to others. But if you like pepperoni, jazz, and rom-coms, and your family likes veggies, rock, and documentaries, it’s okay to watch a jazz documentary with a multi-topping pizza once in a while.
2. Align Your To-Do List with Your Values
Do your activities reflect your values? Try tracking how you spend your waking hours for a whole week. Where do you see opportunities to realign your to-do list to the abundant life God wants you to live? Find time to cultivate your faith, connect with people you love, and rest your weary mind. In that way, you can be your truest self.
3. Spend Within Your Budget
No matter what your income is, you can make a commitment to live within it. Not only will this help you avoid the long-term stress of paying off debt, but it will help you reflect an authentic version of who you are. If you feel like you must overspend to impress your crowd, that may be a clue you’re running with the wrong crowd.
4. Surround Yourself with Supportive Friends
To the previous point, it’s good to stop and take stock of how real you feel within your friend group. It’s been said that you become like the five people you spend the most time with. Are you surrounded by accepting people who cheer for you and love you even with your flaws? Pray that God will lead you to these kinds of friends.
5. Embrace Your Shortcomings
If you’re really hard on yourself when you fall short, it’s important to remember that everyone fails. So, we might as well embrace it. Plus, acknowledging our failures produces a quality that God values. Humility. So, instead of getting stuck in regret or denial, be the truest version of you by giving yourself permission to fail. Being authentic means embracing all part of yourself.
6. Admit When You Act Out of Character
When you get pulled into office gossip, speak up and say you’re sorry. If you lose your temper and regret it, ask the person you’ve hurt for forgiveness. You won’t behave perfectly within your values all of the time. But when you admit your shortcomings, you’ll be acting out of the truest place of who you are, not who you aren’t.
7. Keep Dreaming
Whether it’s getting a master’s degree in your fifties or hopping in an RV with your spouse, keep your dreams alive! Not only is it fun to dream, but having something to lean toward can be a way of expressing a much deeper truth about yourself, such as “I still have much to give,” or “I want to travel and grow old with my spouse.”
8. Silence Your Inner Critic
It’s been said that your own worst critic … is you. Do you talk yourself out of taking courageous or vulnerable steps because you’re afraid you’ll fail? Or maybe your self-talk sabotages the progress you’ve made by only pointing out the potholes. Explore themes of grace in the Scriptures to retrain your mind – and silence your inner critic.
9. Ask God to Reveal His Thoughts About You
Maybe you didn’t have supportive input when you were growing up. Or perhaps you learned to “win” others’ love by getting good grades or being talented on a stage. Have you considered that God loves you just the way you are? Spend time talking to Him about this. Ask Him to show you His thoughts about you and let that guide you toward being authentic. You’ll be so encouraged!
10. Just “Be”
Many competing forces in this world will pressure you to produce more, earn more, and have more. But remember, you’re a human being, not a human “doing.” It’s okay to unplug by simply sitting in God’s presence, sitting still in nature or just taking a nap. Even God rested on the seventh day. Maybe you can take some time to “just be,” too.
