Try these six steps to help you feel more happy
Happy is a funny little word, isn’t it? It has a certain punch to it, and it’s almost impossible to say with a frown on your face. (Some of you just tried.) But what is real happiness, and how can you find it? Do you often wonder how to be happier?
Happy comes from the English word hap, which means chance, fortune, or luck. That sounds like something that just happens to us, not something that we get to create or foster.
Thankfully, that’s not how we use the word today. Happiness is a feeling or expression of pleasure or contentment that we can be intentional about creating. Even if you’ve gone through hard times or there are aspects of your life you wish were different, you can still pursue happiness in your life. It just takes a willingness to try. Embrace these six steps toward greater happiness today.
6 Ways to Create More Happiness in Your Life
1. Invest in relationships
Solid relationships with family, friends, and spouses may be the single-most important indicator of happiness in our lives. According to one long-running study, strong relationships with people impact our happiness (and our long-term health) more than wealth or fame.
So, plan a date with your spouse. Check in on someone you love. Ask about the difficult situation your friend was struggling with. Be quick with encouraging words. If you’ve been feeling isolated, venture out to church, take a class, or connect with a cause.
And don’t forget to spend time in your relationship with God. Simply reading His word and talking to Him about what’s on your mind can strengthen your faith journey with Him, too. And can even teach you how to be happier in your life.
2. Choose gratitude
Research also shows that grateful people are happier people. So, if you’ve slipped into a pattern of looking at what you don’t have – rather than what you do have – here are some ideas:
- Tell God thanks that you woke up with breath in your lungs.
- Look intently to see growth in others (or yourself!) that you didn’t see before.
- Tell your spouse or a friend you’re glad for a specific gesture they made toward you today.
Gratitude not only improves our happiness, but it is also evidence that we’re becoming more like Jesus. He often gave thanks before having a meal or before doing hard things in ministry.
3. Let go of grudges
It can be difficult to forgive others who have hurt you. But holding a grudge takes a lot of work and a lot of negative energy!
If you’ve held on to unforgiveness because you don’t want to let the other person off the hook or because you’re worried that justice won’t be done, that’s honest and relatable. Sometimes people hurt us deeply. But releasing these concerns to God – who cares deeply about both justice and your well-being – will help you be happier and more free.
Is there someone you can forgive today? Your own happiness may be better off for it.
4. Avoid comparison
In today’s world of social media and streaming TV, it’s tempting to look at others and want the beauty or money or jet-setting lives they have. Yet, as President Teddy Roosevelt famously said, “comparison is the thief of joy.”
Comparing your life to someone else’s – especially the carefully curated or posed snapshots you see on social media – won’t make you happier. It inevitably triggers feelings of discontent. How can you avoid this spiral? Limit your time on your phone. Return to step #2 (gratitude) and repeat. And remember, God has more in store for you than you can imagine. You can rest in the reality that God has a unique path for your life. His plans for you are good. You are wonderfully made.
5. Volunteer
Volunteerism is great for your mental health (studies show it decreases stress, depression and anxiety) and it also increases positivity. That’s because volunteering releases a brain chemical that contributes to positive, relaxed feelings. In other words, it helps you feel happy.
Plus, when you give back to your community or church, it’s a double win. You not only feel satisfied, but you also spread happiness beyond just yourself by helping others.
So, volunteer in your church’s nursery, organize a neighborhood food collection drive, or walk dogs kenneled at the local shelter. Not only will you be meeting a positive, healthy need, but you might make new friends in the process – even a few furry ones!
6. Cultivate a hobby
Have busyness and the pressures of this life squeezed out your hobbies? If so, it’s time to get back to what brings you joy. If you like to paint, dust off your paintbrushes. If hiking through God’s creation makes you feel alive, lace up your boots!
Maybe you even have a passion project or dream you’ve wanted to explore, such as going back to school, writing a book, or starting a community garden. The great thing about hobbies is – they’re individual to you. And they reflect back to God an expression of the creativity He placed into you.
A special note on this: If health limitations, caregiving responsibilities or other factors limit your ability to pursue your favorite hobby, a bit of creativity may help. If you love the outdoors but can’t leave your wheelchair-bound mom, perhaps you can find a park trail that’s ADA-accessible. If neck pain makes it difficult to paint for hours on end, perhaps you can paint for an hour and then enjoy reading a book about the stories that inspired famous paintings.
The beauty of happiness is that it’s available in so many different forms. So, find what works for you as you figure out how to be happier. Get a little creative. Have the courage to try new things. And enjoy all the happiness that God has in store for your life.
