The key to dropping an unhealthy habit and forming a new, positive one.
All of us can list good habits we wish we had and bad habits we wish we could break. It’s not always easy. For example, when it comes to our health, wouldn’t it be nice if we could walk past the candy jar on our coworker’s desk? To never be tempted by those shiny wrappers? We can! What we need are ways to strengthen our resolve, to say “no” to easy temptations and “yes” to good decisions.
Recently I found I needed to strengthen my resolve to become healthier. My body was beginning to demonstrate the effects of anxiety and stress in my life, including work. Headaches, sleepless nights, and higher blood pressure convinced me that changes needed to be made.
But quitting my job to travel around the world didn’t seem like a wise move since it would lead to a whole new set of stressors when my employer decided not to give me any more paychecks.
I started thinking about practical ways to work on my mental, physical, and emotional health. I was determined to make better choices—sleeping better, feeding my soul and mind, changing out negative lies for the truth, taking walks in the sunlight, saying “no” to junk food and sugary treats, etc. But the list of habits that needed to change grew long, and I felt my resolve melting away.
I realized I needed to start small, to strengthen my resolve one habit at a time. Instead of tackling everything at once, I decided to start a practice, one practice, that would help me fight stress by processing my thoughts, releasing emotions, and sparking creativity (which for me, feeds my soul).
My answer: poetry. I would to try to write a few lines, just for fun, every evening before bed. With a few tips and tricks that I set up, I found a way to strengthen my resolve and create a new, soul-enriching habit:
1. Set Regular Reminders: I set an alarm one hour before I want to be asleep to remind me to turn off the television and get ready for bed. This simple reminder has created space in my busy schedule to write a few lines in my notebook.
2. Put First Things First: I don’t allow myself to get under the covers until I’ve written four lines. I sit cross-legged with my pillow and notebook open on my lap before I let myself slip between the soft, warm sheets.
3. Give Prominent Placement: My bedside table holds very few items: my alarm clock, lamp, notebook and pen. If I have a book I want to read, I make sure the notebook and pen cover the book so I don’t see it until after I pick up my writing supplies. Seeing the journal is the reminder I need. I know that if I have to open a drawer, I will either forget to write or feel too discouraged in my sleepiness.
4. Put Parameters in Place: I set up some simple prompts for my writing. I pick a word for how I’m feeling and write a short four-line poem or four lines about what the word means to me. These guidelines help me avoid procrastinating when tasks are too broad or vague.
5. Value Pretty over Precious: I use an appealing spiral bound notebook, not an expensive beautiful journal. My pen is basic, but I love the way it writes. When I come into the room I enjoy the sight of my notebook, but at the same time it’s not intimidating. I’m not striving for perfect penmanship or grand thoughts. I try to make the task enjoyable, not overwhelmingly important.
6. Take Small Steps: At four lines, I can keep the poems short, writing only a few minutes each night. I don’t let time become an issue. Five minutes a day always feels doable.
7. Be Adaptable: I don’t make complicated or demanding rules. Once when I was traveling, I forgot my notebook. Instead of letting that stop me, I used my phone notes app to journal my writing. I won’t let not having all the supplies I normally use break my habit.
8. Rephrase Your Words: I remind myself that this task is fun, easy, and enjoyable. I try to switch my language when I hear “I need to” or “I have to” or worse yet, “I should” come out of my mouth or into my thoughts. I stop and rephrase my sentence to “I get to” or “I want to” go write.”
9. Savor Small Successes: I make sure to notice the small wins along the way. Some nights when I’m done writing I flip back a few pages and reread some previous entries. It reminds me of what I was thinking about or how I was feeling that day. I find I enjoy reading what I’ve written. It makes me want to write more!
10. Encourage Yourself: I remind myself that all these little writing moments are adding up to one big win: better health. Learning to channel my emotions into words and process my feelings in a simple, quick, nightly habit has helped me lower my anxiety and stress levels at night and therefore sleep better. And a bonus win: I’m feeling more creative which, as I said, feeds my soul.
Now that my poetry habit is firmly established—not as a dreary task, but as a joyful practice—I can incorporate these ten concepts in the creation of another new healthy habit. Like me, you too can strengthen your resolve by using some of the simple tips above. Give them a try and see how they can help you make a change.
